Am I a hoarder????

Why can't I seem to let go of my big clothes?  Some of my old clothes are so big that as soon as I pull them up, they fall to my ankles!  My old shirts are so big they make me look like a clown.  So why can't I seem to get rid of them?  I know I want to save at least one pair of jeans so I can compare later when I get to goal weight.  Still - my closet and drawers are STUFFED FULL of clothes that I can't and don't wear.  I guess I'm going to have to figure something out this weekend.  I'm afraid that I don't want to get rid of things because my subconscious doesn't trust me to keep the weight off.  AAGGHHH - I swear, weight loss is more of a MENTAL exercise than a physical one!  I just KNOW that when I finally sort through everything I am going to have two pairs of pants, one pair of shorts, and three shirts.  That's IT.  I'm going to be wearing a lot of the same crap for a while!

My Mom will be out visiting in a few months and I can't STAND the wait!  I REALLY miss having skype - I hate that we have not "seen" each other in over a month now.  When Mom comes out I am going to treat the two of us to a mani/pedi!  Won't that be fun!  I miss my Mom SO MUCH!  I miss her even more for the kids!  Colin is just CRAZY about his grandma!  This summer is going to DRAG because I will be anxiously awaiting her arrival!!

Yesterday's run was really REALLY hard!  Ever since that last race caught me off guard, I have vowed to include some hills in my training.  They are seriously kicking my ass!  I can barely do 2.5 miles with the hills!  I'm going to do one hill run each week - hopefully that is enough to improve my hill running as well as my speed!  I think I read somewhere once that running hills was speed work in disguise!

I've been searching for the perfect first 10k to run - I found one I'm interested in, but it's a little further out than I wanted.  The 10k I saw was in mid September, I really was hoping for a mid August.  My last day of 10k training ends the first week of August - I don't want to have to wait TOO long for the race!  I'm SO nervous and excited about doing 10k - it's crazy how you can feel the two emotions at the exact same time!  I have to keep reminding myself - I didn't think I would ever be able to run 5k at a 12 minute mile but here I am!  I often go faster than that too!!  I LOVE being a runner!  It feels like I'm a part of a secret society! HAHAHA  OOOOOOHHH and I ordered a window sticker for my car that says 5K.  YAY!  I am going to get a sticker for each distance that I complete!  I am DREAMING about the half!!

Thanks for reading my blathering!!  Have a GREAT night! -Monica