I ran this morning. It was only one mile, but at least I ran! I actually had set my alarm to wake me up early enough so I could do 3 miles before getting everyone ready and out the door for school. I slept through it. Actually, I dreamed through it. You see - I heard the alarm, but my dream transformed the sound of the alarm into a crowd cheering. They were cheering for me. They were cheering because I ran a 5k with an 8 minute per mile pace. HAHAHAHAHA I have a feeling THAT one is only in my dreams. Too funny! I woke up thinking - whoa, did that happen. Then I looked down at my fat body and realized, nope. I wish my body matched my mind and my heart. I have the heart of an athlete. Too bad I don't have the ass of one. :-/ Ok, I'm feeling a bit down today, if you couldn't tell. Lots of things have been going on around here.
Yesterday I took my daughter in for her well baby check up. Remember that bad stomach virus we all had? Remember how we were throwing up a lot and very forcefully? Well, I had noticed my daughter's belly button was sticking out a bit more than usual. It turns out she now has a hernia. I'm a little upset. I know it's minor and there is a chance that it will close up on it's own. Thing is, I know my kids. My kids seem to always take the hard road. My son had 3 surgeries before he was 2 years old. Susie had a surgery before she was 4 months old. I just feel like my poor babies have had enough, they should get a bye on the bad stuff. I know it doesn't work that way, but it feels like it should. I am worried about her - I hate this "wait and see" mentality.
I am so bummed about the microwave being broken. It feels harder to make healthy meals. I always made the kids their lunch and the nuked a smart ones frozen meal for myself. It was so easy and it kept my points down and kept me honest. I also hate that I have to use all my freaking pots to make a meal. I used to always microwave my veggies but now I have to cook them on the stove. I swear - from having no heat for 3 months and needing to split my own wood to burn in the fireplace and now no microwave - I feel like a pioneer woman. If I have to hitch up horses to a wagon, I'm outta here. HAHA
Oh, and to top it all off - it seems like my face pains are ramping up again. I can't remember the last time I had any - I want to say it was early November. The last time I had a bad attack was in July - that was torture. A few days ago I got a few zaps of pain. Then today I had several - I want to say I had 15 zaps today. It's funny - I think the fact that I don't have an actual diagnosis other than atypical face pain makes me doubt myself. At times I wonder if the pain was all in my head. Especially when I have a long stretch of no pain. I think, well, maybe it was all in my head - maybe I never really had any pain. I also get to thinking that maybe the pain wasn't as bad as I was thinking. Then the pains come back and I remember. It's definitely not in my head. I guess I'm just going to have to live with pain forever. How can I take a medication for something that is sporadic? How can I take a medication for something that has no name? How do you treat me if you don't now what is wrong with me? I feel like the doctors just want to throw medication at my symptoms instead of trying to heal me. It sucks hard.
Ok - I'm sorry. Maybe the gray weather is getting to me, but I think it's just a bunch of crappy things happening at once. I'll be ok. I'm good at bouncing back. Tomorrow is my appointment with the orthopedist for my finger. Wish me luck. I'm a little nervous to find out what is going on. I don't seem to be getting a whole lot of good news lately. :-/
Thank you for reading! I hope you all have a better night than me! -Monica
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