Thursday, January 10, 2013

Two down, two to go!

I ran this morning.  It was only one mile, but at least I ran!  I actually had set my alarm to wake me up early enough so I could do 3 miles before getting everyone ready and out the door for school.  I slept through it.  Actually, I dreamed through it.  You see - I heard the alarm, but my dream transformed the sound of the alarm into a crowd cheering.  They were cheering for me.  They were cheering because I ran a 5k with an 8 minute per mile pace. HAHAHAHAHA  I have a feeling THAT one is only in my dreams.  Too funny!  I woke up thinking - whoa, did that happen.  Then I looked down at my fat body and realized, nope.  I wish my body matched my mind and my heart.  I have the heart of an athlete.  Too bad I don't have the ass of one.  :-/  Ok, I'm feeling a bit down today, if you couldn't tell.  Lots of things have been going on around here.

Yesterday I took my daughter in for her well baby check up.  Remember that bad stomach virus we all had? Remember how we were throwing up a lot and very forcefully?  Well, I had noticed my daughter's belly button was sticking out a bit more than usual.  It turns out she now has a hernia.  I'm a little upset.  I know it's minor and there is a chance that it will close up on it's own.  Thing is, I know my kids.  My kids seem to always take the hard road.  My son had 3 surgeries before he was 2 years old.  Susie had a surgery before she was 4 months old.  I just feel like my poor babies have had enough, they should get a bye on the bad stuff.  I know it doesn't work that way, but it feels like it should.  I am worried about her - I hate this "wait and see" mentality.

I am so bummed about the microwave being broken.  It feels harder to make healthy meals.  I always made the kids their lunch and the nuked a smart ones frozen meal for myself.  It was so easy and it kept my points down and kept me honest.  I also hate that I have to use all my freaking pots to make a meal.  I used to always microwave my veggies but now I have to cook them on the stove.  I swear - from having no heat for 3 months and needing to split my own wood to burn in the fireplace and now no microwave - I feel like a pioneer woman.  If I have to hitch up horses to a wagon, I'm outta here.  HAHA

Oh, and to top it all off - it seems like my face pains are ramping up again.  I can't remember the last time I had any - I want to say it was early November.  The last time I had a bad attack was in July - that was torture.  A few days ago I got a few zaps of pain.  Then today I had several - I want to say I had 15 zaps today.   It's funny - I think the fact that I don't have an actual diagnosis other than atypical face pain makes me doubt myself.  At times I wonder if the pain was all in my head.  Especially when I have a long stretch of no pain.  I think, well, maybe it was all in my head - maybe I never really had any pain.  I also get to thinking that maybe the pain wasn't as bad as I was thinking.  Then the pains come back and I remember.  It's definitely not in my head.  I guess I'm just going to have to live with pain forever.  How can I take a medication for something that is sporadic?  How can I take a medication for something that has no name?  How do you treat me if you don't now what is wrong with me?  I feel like the doctors just want to throw medication at my symptoms instead of trying to heal me.  It sucks hard.

Ok - I'm sorry.  Maybe the gray weather is getting to me, but I think it's just a bunch of crappy things happening at once.  I'll be ok.  I'm good at bouncing back.  Tomorrow is my appointment with the orthopedist for my finger.  Wish me luck.  I'm a little nervous to find out what is going on.  I don't seem to be getting a whole lot of good news lately.  :-/

Thank you for reading!  I hope you all have a better night than me!  -Monica

No comments:

Post a Comment